Insights

My daddy loves to play and my mama lives her life with tremendous intensity, so growing up that caused a little tension. But my brother, my daddy and I usually won out and the playing continued with my mama smiling and shaking her head. In my house with my own children it was somewhat the same. Mr. Incredible loves to play and I was more the rule person; however, since I was raised to play, that was helpful in our quest to find ways to play with our children. Sometimes it was just that I didn’t get mad when he was playing with them because I was too busy.

What place does play have in our busy lives and the lives of our children? Does play need to have a place? Yes! Play is absolutely crucial in the lives of children. I know that every dad just cheered and the moms eyes rolled, but keep reading mamas, I don’t come at you with this truth. And maybe your house is the opposite and mama is more the one who loves to play. Or maybe both mama and daddy are so exhausted from life that no one is playing.

I remember being on a long road trip when I was 7 yrs old and my younger brother and I were both so bored and getting on each other’s nerves and fighting and suddenly my daddy pulled the car over to the side of the road, headed to the back of our station wagon, threw open the back door and I thought for sure we were about to get in serious trouble. Instead, he climbed in and began to tickle us and wrestle with us and we had a play break on the side of that road. That is such a core memory for me of play. We need it as children and as adults. But as adults, we have lost our ability to switch off responsibility and just play. We view play more as a frivolity than a practice of excellence. Jim Burns, founder of HomeWord, said, “A great thing happens to families when they play together: They begin to talk and laugh and lighten up. Family memories are built, inside jokes are shared, and serious moments of intimacy are communicated. Families need special times together to build lifelong memories and to play together.”

In Zechariah 8, the prophet is painting a picture of what it will look like when Israel comes back from captivity, he is painting a picture of freedom and he says in verse 5, “The city streets will be filled with boys and girls playing there.” When you picture children playing, it paints a story of security, of joy, of a life with few cares creating a firm foundation and a hope for the future.

I know life is filled with pressures and time constraints and bills and responsibility and playing together feels like something we can easily cut out that will allow more time for seemingly more important things. But I promise playing together will yield benefits for the rest of your life with your children, even into their adulthood. They are only little and wanting to play with you for a short season. If you play with them now, that sense of security and fun and trust established in playing when they were young, will guide the relationship you have with them as adults that lasts for decades.

So pick up a basketball, pull out a board game, host an imaginary tea party, play a card game or plan a trip to play hard somewhere this summer. I do not regret one moment of playing with my children or watching my husband play with my children while I finished dinner or did another load of laundry. Purpose to play with your children in small mundane moments and big moments of celebration, you need it as much as they do, and watch the Lord paint a picture of joy and freedom in your home. If play is not your strong suit, don’t complicate it, ask the Lord to help you see and take avenues to play that lead to joy for you and for them. When your children invite you to play with them, as much as you can, do it! You will never regret playing more with your children. As an empty nester, I promise those are some of the moments you miss the most, the moments of play.

Becky Ross
Primary Education Principal
Logos Preparatory Academy