Insights

Many factors shape our identities. Some aspects of our identity are set at birth and others are developed over time. Born in the image of God, we choose each day whether to press closer to that likeness or allow our sin nature to identify us. Teaching students to recognize the difference is critical as they move toward their adult lives. How we treat those around us is an excellent indicator of what we are allowing to shape what is within us. Recently, I was introduced to the Marigold Effect. The Marigold Effect is being used to teach educators how to be encouragers of one another. 

Marigolds, when planted in a garden, offer their cheerful colors and beauty while also providing value to the surrounding plants.  Marigolds, which require little care, deter destructive pests and attract beneficial insects. Their scent masks the smell of crops and flowers shielding them from garden nibblers such as rabbits. The Marigold is a sought after garden plant.  “If you plant a marigold beside most any garden vegetable, that vegetable will grow big and strong and healthy, protected and encouraged by its marigold.” - Jennifer Gonzalez

Marigolds are those who display the fruits of the spirit.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23

When planted by other plants, the walnut tree has the opposite effect of the marigold. Walnut trees give off toxins that destroy nearby plants. The walnut tree can be compared to the one described in Proverbs 6:16-19.

“There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies and a person who stirs up conflict in the community.”

Let’s begin to celebrate marigold behavior and discourage walnut behavior. Here are six differences between marigolds and walnuts that I encourage you to share with your children. Consider taking one each day or week to discuss. Ask your children to identify times in their lives when they have been marigolds or walnuts. Allow them to share when others have been so for them. Consider memorizing the verses that go with each lesson. If you enjoy the conversations, the book 30 days to Taming Your Tongue  by Deborah Smith Pegues offers 24 more ideas.

Walnut

1. Slanders
“Make malicious, false or even true statements about others with the intent of damaging their reputation.” (From Taming Your Tongue)

2. Gossips/Betrays
“A gossip may not necessarily harbor ill will toward his victim; however, a betrayer divulges information in a breach of confidence.” (From Taming Your Tongue)

3. Belittles
Do people feel better about themselves after spending time with you or do you focus on their shortcomings and use disparaging remarks? 

4. Speaks Harshly
“Harsh words never die, they can impact a person for a lifetime.” (From Taming Your Tongue)

5. Speaks Rudely
“Ill-mannered, discourteous communication has become standard practice, even among God’s children.”(From Taming Your Tongue, published in 2005)

6. Is Judgmental
“Judgmental people engage in a critical, fault-finding assessment of another person's behavior.” (From Taming Your Tongue)

Marigold

1. Speaks Well Of
“Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing.” I Thessalonians 4:11

2. Guards Others/Keep Confidences 
“A talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter.” Proverbs 11:13

3. Builds Up
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29

4. Is Gentle
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1

5. Speaks with Kindness
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

6. Is Loving Toward and Accepting of Others
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Matthew 7: 1 -2

Tammy McIlvoy
Head of School 
Logos Preparatory Academy