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3 John 1: 4

“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.”

The emotion in this verse is joy and it is how we feel when we get a good report about our children walking in truth!  What is our emotion while we are training them to walk in truth, to be a disciple?  Is it still joy?  Or maybe frustration, anger, fear, guilt? Emotions are a good and gracious gift to everyone created in the image of God. We just need to deal with them and respond to them in a healthy, biblical way that honors God and helps us to disciple well.

I don’t believe God intended for the “feelings of the day” to guide us as we disciple. He wants that job. God wants to be our guide. Our feelings should not be what drives our decisions, but rather an indicator of what’s going on inside us.  We must check ourselves as parents consistently so that when we engage with our children on the path of discipleship we can be the “steady” to their occasional “crazy”.  I know that is easier said than done, but it is important!  

The path to discipleship is just that, a path, not a destination.  Discipleship is not a one time act.  If it were, we could all manage to suck it up and keep our emotions in check for that one moment and all would be good.  But that is not how parenting works. 

When our children are small, there are countless “discipleship opportunities'' every day cleverly disguised as “impossible behaviors” where we correct poor behavior, encourage right behavior, and hug it out at the end.  As our children get older, the discipleship opportunities are all there but our ability to stay calm as we correct, encourage and love becomes harder to stay the course and finish that cycle.  They can now talk back and argue their side of their poor behavior.  This brings emotion in a whole new dynamic and it can become an argument that, you as the parent, feel you must win at any emotional cost. 

You won’t win an argument by telling someone they are ridiculous and here are the 50 logical reasons why.  We aren’t as logical as we think we are. 90% of our choices are emotionally driven. We win hearts by being in a relationship and showing compassion to one another. You don’t win arguments, you win people’s affection. 

Be the parent, stay the course, hold them accountable, but do it all with the emotion of love, unconditional love. It is the emotion most prevalent in our relationship with our Heavenly Father.  Yes, He disciplines us and chastens us but it is all done with  love.  “This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another”. 1 John 4:11

Becky Ross
Primary Education Principal
Logos Preparatory Academy